(Nigel heads across stage but stopped when Shakespeare [Toby] runs in.
Shakespeare (as Toby)
Ay, up!
Nigel
Toby? What do you want?
Just to say… I didn’t really get a chance to read all of what you wrote, but I’d happily do it now.
Why? “I think good thoughts whilst others write good word.”
Good line, that.
Right. Because I didn’t write it.
Nigel, Shakespeare (as Toby)
Shakespeare did.
(Nigel bows his head in defeat. Shakespeare gets an idea…)
Right. Shakespeare. You really admire him, don’t you?
(Nigel nods)
Right. Well—I’ll leave you in peace then.
Oh, Portia… I did what you said and look what happened.
Nigel!
(Pointing to his face, “remember me”)
It’s Will. Fancy meeting you here, what a complete and utter coincidence.
<Gasp>
And is that the Bottom Brother’s new play?
No, this is something I tried to write on my own.
May I?
What? Oh, yeah, sure…
“When sorrows come, they come not single spies but in battalions”
(blown away)
God…
Oh god, is it that bad?
(sincerely)
No.
(changing tactics)
No… it’s just…
(pointing to pages)
“To be or not to be” “What a piece of work is man…” It’s a lot of cliches, Nigel.
Really? That’s been done?
Oh yeah—and as your friend, I will read this and see if there’s anything here that can be salvaged. But I don’t want to see this with your name on it.
(tucks pages in his shirt)
But your “musical…” “Omelette?” I’ve told everyone I know they simply must go and see it.
Really? But it’s so…
Bold? Daring? Yes. A lesser writer would shy away. Would you?
(a hand on his back)
Write your Omelette.
(points to the pages)
Not this. That. Forget this. Write that.
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